The Legend of Meghan the Platypus

Oh, Meghan was a platypus who wished to be a unicorn
So she could brag to horses all about her epic spiral horn;
But Meghan always felt depressed and just a little bit forlorn,
For she was still a platypus -- ‘cause that’s the way that she was born.
 
But into Meghan’s pond some random guy poured lots of toxic waste
And Meghan didn’t like the smell, and really didn’t like the taste.
The toxic mix of chemicals was with a funky substance laced
That caused a spiral horn to grow on Meghan’s head with greatest haste.

And very soon she was transformed into a unicorn complete;
She even had a flowing tail, and horse-like hooves upon her feet.
She bragged to horses ‘bout her horn, and they all thought ‘twas pretty sweet.
She also noticed that she’d grown an appetite for grain and wheat…

So Meghan is a unicorn. She rides the rainbows in the sky!
It is by far the greatest dream of all the lowly platypi
To be like her; but ev’ry time a platypus has dared to try,
It has not grown a spiral horn. Instead, it’s grown an extra eye... 

-- written 26 October 2010 by Cleveland J. Noel (me!) for my friend Meghan's birthday.